Children don't tell you

      My son told me yesterday he was told he had to bring money in for lunch. I knew it wasn't true. So, I hung out in the office this morning until I knew it had gone through the computer system to the lunch room. Than I went down to the lunch room with my children and made sure they heard the woman in charge say it wouldn't happen again. Someone in the office commented that it was odd his did not work but his sister's did. Hmmmm. So I asked his sister. "It happens to me, too". Oh, so that's why she wanted to start bringing her own lunch. So, we made sure it went through the system for both of them.
   I hear over and over again from parent after parent "I have my job and going to school is my child's. It's the way the world is and it's what we have to do. Not everyone plays nice on the playground, get used to it." The message children hear is "Don't bother complaining about anything". "Mom, I don't want to go to school". "Well, you have to". Yes, eventually you learn to stop "complaining", you stop expressing what does not feel good to adults and even your peer group who parrot their parents because they don't want you to stir their suffering in silence divine inner being.
  My children didn't get that message today. Today they heard "No, the mother is still here in the office waiting for us to see this through", lol No yelling, no bitching, a simple quiet statement: "My child is told each day he does not have what it takes to get food. He needs to hear that he does indeed have what it takes". Then sit and wait.
   Of course my children are bit anxious about this; "Mommy is discussing the elephant in the room!". So, my daughter fidgets with a pen. On the counter."Don't write on the counter", I begin to say as the receptionist gasps in horror with a "What on earth would make you ...". Me, firmly: "NO>  you are not going to shame this child as if she is the only child in existence to ever have doodled on a counter, she knows better, I just reminded her, give me something and I'll clean in off". Receptionist: "No, I'll clean it".
   "I believe we'll need tardy slips for each of them and a parent pass for me." I mention. Receptionist "Yeah, I'll get to it". The other office staff person went ahead and filled them out with a "I didn't write a time on them so you can take your time in the cafeteria". THANK YOU!
    Made sure I handed the tardy slip to each teacher personally with a mention to my daughter's teacher: "Kids have been making fun of her in the lunchroom, let's make sure that doesn't happen again". "I'll keep an eye on it", the teacher said.
   My daughter didn't jump up and down for joy, but there was pride in her step. My son glowed with affection. Stomach aches had left.
    Some times in life we are where we don't want to be, but it does not mean we are absolutely powerless in how we are treated in those places and children need to know these things. Parents don't realize because they killed that inner child long ago, around kindergarten, and that's why they cannot even fathom their child's own.
   I'm feeling far more confident in my conscious parenting, which makes it less resistant, softer and just that much more effective. I am the lion with whom the lamb is safe and comforted ;)