Opposites?

     A woman tried to push me around. She couldn't. So she caught my son while he was by himself and said something to him that would make him afraid. I complained. (yeah, I know, we shouldn't). I was told by the woman in charge of the place we were staying to just stay away from her and yes, she's heard the woman talk to my children and she wouldn't let that woman near my children either. "You two are just opposites", the woman in charge commented after threatening me with being evicted if I complained one more time about the terrorist of children (others have been given the same threat in response to the same complaint about their children being terrorized by this one woman).
   Opposites? No, not really. The woman who stalked and terrorized my son while he was vulnerably alone (yeah, I know, strong words) manipulates people's perception of her by being nice to those she chooses, disguising malicious acts with good intent ("I was just cleaning!" as the excuse to dump someone's fresh cup of coffee), doing malicious deeds when she thinks no one sees and whining "She didn't accept my apology", when it was excuses given rather than a sincere admit ion of wrong treatment. We would call such a woman evil or bad.
   One of the hardest things I had to face coming from the opposite end of the spectrum was that being a people pleaser was just as manipulative and untrustworthy as the "other". We call the "rugs"/people pleasers "good" when in fact they are doing the same thing: attempting to control other people's perceptions of them; "Please just like me"/"See me as likeable". No one really knows what is under that rug because the real personality has been swept under it in exchange for what one thinks others perceive as "good" qualities. The persona is an equally fake mask. Equally treacherous.
   One of the most empowering aspects of this journey for me has been to truly "hear" and realize that "perceptions belong to 'god' ". So, up came the rug, shined the light of my conscious awareness on my real feelings and beginning to stand by me. There really is no other choice, it seems. I have to be honest about what does and does not work for me.
   And dang, nothing makes us more honest than good old flu-like infection wreaking havoc on the body! Temp of 103.1 and I'm told "You have to fill out 3 applications a day, remember you HAVE to find a job within 30 days to not be evicted!" (read the small print which says 'make a sincere effort, so again undue threats by the 'headmistress'). Yup, back in the world of duress again!