Whose hat is that?

     In preparation for winter I went through my children's closets to see what could be used this year and what no longer fit. I gathered all the winter hats and mittens in a bag and set them by the door where they'd be easily accessed. My son wandered over a few days later and started going through it, trying on all the hats. He pulled out a hat and asked me "Whose hat is this one?". "Whoever's head is cold", I responded.
    In developed countries, even amongst the most "enlightened"....... people can't even imagine a life without money, without everything being a commodity, without permanant sole ownership. The closest they come is believing the answer is a system of barter and trade. So, the veggies become the money and the system begins again, determining a value of number of these veggies compared to those veggies and that hat. They think it will rid us of overlords....ummmm, history teaches us they'll take those veggies as tax payments and if you have no veggies to turn over, they'll take your children.
    The "enlightened" souls want crowds of clueless people to preach to, life coaches want people experiencing helplessness to coach. They ALL want money to live lives of luxury. They do not REALLY want to see the present system fail. They'd like to tweak it a bit so it is more comfortable for them, but they still envision and dream dreams of becoming big corporations, being on the covers of magazines, to be the "success" stories.
    We can imagine knitted hats as free to whomever needs them because we all have too many anyways. Grandmas are always knitting them, sisters, neighbors, cousins. Hats and mittens for everyone and anyone willing to take them. With those, it is easy to know it belongs to whomever has need of it. But that housing? That land? That wool? Those veggies?
     The wool belongs to whomever knits. Whatever is knitted belongs to the one who needs something to wear. The land belongs to the one who can cultivate it. What is cultivated belongs to the one who is hungry. The house belongs to whomever needs a roof over their head. Simple, really. If the world can cough up millions of people in need of life coaching to fulfill your dreams of being a life coach, do you not believe it can muster up a builder for your home? A weaver for the fabric and seamstress for your clothes? Aren't women renowned for "social networking"; knowing who is needing what and what others posses? Aren't there awesome coordinators of information who can see things get to those who need them? Aren't there those with strong backs who love nothing more than a day's hard physical labor who might enjoy moving them? Alot of them will do it for pizza and beer and do we not have those who love nothing more than brewing? We have those who love to travel and we have devout 'homebodies', networkers and stabilizers.
     We already have everything we need in abundance, in Earth and in each other. We only need to let go of the perceived need to control and permanently posses.

   

An Armageddon of my very own! I'm such a lucky lady!

Hey ya hey ya heeeya ho, hey ya hey ya hee ya ho, hey ya, hey ya, hey ya hey ya ho, hey ya hey ya hee ha ho

A week or so ago I got the message I would be getting my 'clypticle'. A couple days before I was being given a key card to hotel room on the top floors and experienced concern about having what it took to use it. I was reassured I did.

I have spent my days imagining greatness for myself, ease, luxury, overabundance flowing money, tropical islands, horses, estate..the best of everything I have been given to imagine. I could feel their energy, being as 'intuitive' as I am, a could connect with those energies and having cleared myself, I could allow myself to experience the feeling of being in circumstances that would allow those things in. As I agree to make grandiose statements chills run up my spine. Daily I experience such 'tickles' from the universe of recognition.

I bring smiles to all around me, loving them so deeply, delighting in every possible thing with depth and sincerity. Allowing all mine and everyone else's feelings. Allowing life to get "messy".

Yesterday came a culmination of incoming 'smells' of previous experiences of complete destitution and the courage I expressed during them.

I had created a nice, tidy cocoon for my transition which included food stamps, cash benefits, something steady.

I have won prizes in three car dealership mailings, of gift cards but suddenly things aren't working out. I had moved to let go of all the assistance I had in getting around,  moving about in this cocoon of circumstance. I had been being moved to say no to anything that was less than what I had imagined for myself.

Now, my freezer is empty and my food stamps are not going to be put on my card this month, I just found out this morning. That means no more cash benefits will be coming.

Yesterday I had what would have been considered a string of bad luck, using last of cash for cab to get to grocery store where I could not do the grocery shopping I had planned because a big sign at the front of the store notified us food stamps were late. I had to use the bathroom when I got there and it was closed being cleaned. My son got lost in the store, somehow going from the back of the store in the blink of an eye to being lost in women's clothing.

That $1,000 gift card I won but couldn't find transportation to claim would have been real handy right now! lol Now I've got the third winning flyer and have no ride to claim. All these resources slipping right through my fingers!

But I have been here before energetically, being devastated completely and brought into unbelievably abundant circumstances polluted by an abusive man and I remember wishing I had gotten for myself, by myself. We were paid an entire winter's accommodation in a hotel with spending money, Christmas presents for the children and when it was time to go: a freakin' car! But due to the guy I was with in whose name everything was given because I had no driver's license or ID, we did not benefit from any of it. It was all lost to his poor choices.

So now I have accepted I can make good decisions. I see the value in being choosy about with whom we partner up.

So in the same moment I am screaming within at the devastation, the memory, the pain, the confusion and singing in ecstasy as I realize what it all means:

This not a personal attack of deprivation, this is a shedding of all polluted energetic connections, I am rising from the sea of confusion and abusive control onto the solid ground of immortal, unlimited, abundance. I have made it to shore! I am letting go of the life jacket, man-made support that allowed me to feel the experience of floating, swimming, making it, not having to worry about staying afloat until I could trust the feeling of stability, security that comes from within me.

And so I strip naked, I paint my sacred body and dance a dance of relishing my liberation. Do I know how that abundance shall arrive? No. Am I hung up on the lottery and these car dealership winnings? No. They are all a part of the 'bread and circus' illusion. I dance and I sing triumphantly. No, the joke is not on me for in leaving me "destitute", the only thing they have divested me of is their energy stain.

And before these energies/agents let go, I poisoned them with hope. I stated clearly what it means to be truly free in writing, sending it to all levels involved in 'social services' and distribution of wealth, authority over 'abundance' illusions.

Which means there is no reason to turn around. It won't be landing upon my head as it comes crashing down.

I may be moved quickly and suddenly at the first opportunity. I may be allowed to leave gracefully and leisurely.  Either way, I know the Universe has got me. It has already been arranged. I only know I no longer resonate energetically with any part of these circumstances, this placement--whoopsie!And "lord knows" I always leave a wake anyone open to expansion can follow.

Is this easy? No! This is where the warrioress in me comes in. Not to fight anything or protect me
 from anything, but to give strength in allowing everything within me to happen that needs be, to "play catch" with the urge to fall into negative thoughts, to be on her toes constantly to catch negative thinking and comfort it, love the aspects that feel insecurity, skepticism, doubt, fear, aggression, etc. To coordinate and direct attention...the battle field makes a warrior dexterous, aware, far-seeing, intuitive. In the state of wholeness where there is nothing to fear, THAT is the role of the warrior.
In the meantime I browse an unsolicited catalog of equine products, western wear, etc knowing it is note from the Universe to let me know it hears and is answering. I continue to envision and dream and imagine and feel where I want to be energetically and more and more it is the only vibration I am emanating.

And while a part of me thinks there couldn't have been a worst time for the inspired choices I've made that led to this......I'm willing to bet on an energetic level, the timing couldn't be more perfect! Dependency is quite often nothing more than an illusion. Practical means are simply presented to trigger our allowance of the feeling of "possible", because 'practical' means are anything but practical ;)
This is my circumstance exhale, clearing the bronchial tubes for a greater inhale.....just breath, watch circumstances come and go like the breath that flows through me, breathing ever and ever greater depths of clear, clean, abundant, unconditional.
At the end of it, I think the only thing that really COULD devastate me more completely IS unconditional love in all it's expression. It's the only thing I refused to allow in and as with everything else, I have a habit of first discovering things for myself before allowing others to bring it to me and unconditional love for self is what I have been practicing. So, I guess I know what is coming. And yes, that scares me.


Every once in a while, we get our very own Armageddon. It is a blessed event.

Not long after all the above I felt an energy in the right side of my brain that "wasn't supposed to be there"...it usually only entered the left side of my brain.  And not long after that "it" happened. And 'it' was pleasant, stirring out and flushing up to be loved even more of that which I had experienced as me.

Going inward again

     The "I AM" is merging with the "There's only me". Excruciating despite lack of tension and resistance. I am feeling ambition. This physical experience has never included ambition previously. Interesting. It's just sitting there in existence with no specific target but  a general description of luxury, relationship, ease without condition..winning the lottery and romantic involvement, lol. Formless yet explicit. Passion..woooeeee. Do nothing, be everything. To create without cause. To be conscious and aware without pause. Project nothing, express it all. Just floating while firmly grounded. No making sense amidst finely honed senses. Holy shit, I'm amazing! The hardest part was realizing it's easy that I am experiencing, lol. No longer excruciating.
    So, if I am not responding with matching excitement it's because I am quiet, allowing the merging. What I shall be responding with when this is finished is yet to be determined I would imagine.

 

Soul to soul.......Hongi and Namaste, my human body

     We have come to know to take out what we bring in at campsites and nature preserves. We have come to know it is in all our best interests to not leave a footprint when we come and go about the Earth as human beings.
      I wonder if we could not do the same as souls 'just having experiences' in human form for the 'campsite' of human flesh. Could we not restore what it is we have used once our adventure has ended?
Hongi and Namaste, my human body

Today's story- Nothing Greater

     I found today's story in it's background. We began this physical existence a warrioress spirit coupled to an ancient naive pacifist soul. We have the human aspect representing mother and child of the physical, father of the spirit world, and the core of all being-The Dance. And so the dance began within this thing given the name Stacey.
     The warrioress spirit was so strong she could easily over power the pacifist when we were in the youth of our shared experience....so much so the soul would be blacked out, the warrioress would kick the ass of a man over 6 feet tall and give consciousness back when it was good and done. She was easily offended and easily provoked. Well, soul and body found this incredibly disturbing and developed powers of their own.
     The Dance, Father and Mother 'awoke' at various points within a short period and the whirlwind began. Holy shit and holy crap what a barrel of experiences this life has been! The miracles, devastation, astral travels, legends......all becoming greater and drawing from within themselves everything they had with a child in the middle demanding they all work it out and the Dance giving tips on how to make that happen.
     Today I come to the realization that in fact, there is nothing greater in the heavens than what has become of this human consciousness. And with that fact is indifference. There is enough greatness for everyone. Benevolent, all knowing, all loving, all present, all being...it simply is.
     Last night looking for something to focus on to keep me awake because my children simply were no where near ready for sleep, I went to YouTube and followed to a recommended channeling. There it was said we would recognize communications from our 5th dimensional self because it would be pretty much formless and most like outlined with silver. A moment's curiosity but moved on having become somewhat disenchanted with the spirit realms. I have been working from the core of my being, thinning the veils of heart, mind and spirit to be open channels of the core of my being, central sun, connection to source and Dance within.
     Finally went to sleep and was seeing an energetic mostly blue with crystal white core flame outlined in silver and sensing being informed "you are getting your calypticle" when my phone rang and I was brought into physical focus. The sensation of perfect peace, health and well being came into the physical form and began to feel it's self squeezed....aches began to manifest. Got at least one insight out of the experience: the ache I believe I feel in my body is actually that of my spirit. Physical form is not comfortable to my spirit. It aches within it. It is at peace with that.
   Knowing my spirit as I do, she gets excited at challenges, so when she would come back all excited, my soul and body would go "oh, no, something is coming that will challenge me today". When spirit would come back in the morning all glum, soul and body go "oh, yay! We get an easy day!". Spirit bringing back that information was indifferent, so spirit was not impressed. The closest I can come to a definition online of calypticle is a destructive event. In my case that usually means a destruction of circumstances, a dismantling, a change. What is more destructive to a warrioress spirit than allowing?..... allowing in love, abundance, ease and everything the physical would want in an experience. If it were a traumatic destruction, she'd have been elated at the challenge, the soul would have been appreciating an expansion inunderstanding, knowledge, charector, etc...but no, no elation. Something GOOD is coming! says the human.
    I did spend yesterday embodying graceful, easy, requesting and feeling, a new depth and awareness and knowing in ease, quieting the mind keeping the heart open, everything flowing honestly. I spend alot of time responding to my heart and mind with all the feelings coming through "don't touch it, let it go", we're not attaching thoughts or experiences to any of these negative feelings...keep them flowing, they're just passing through.
   I realized yesterday what I master of the Law of Attraction we have become. I can read people's energies, feel the law of attraction coming through seeking a cooperative component, recognizing I am in no way subject to it...simply aware and having the option of joining it's flow or just observing. No resistance to it, no resistance to not going with the flow. No doubt, no anxiety. It's just making it's rounds.
   Thankfully, I have been blessed with drawing and being given some absolutely fantastic spiritual awake and conscious humans. I logged on to "show me your sexy" and "feeling magnificent" and while I was still feeling the ache of embodying my spirit, I chose to move the sexy and magnificent energy. The environment aided that option with a neighbor who just bought himself the first suit he's warn in like 20 years for today's occasion, played with him being sexy. Other neighbor was out and what's more sexy than a pregnant woman? Nothing! So, played with her and sexy. I love that I can choose the options I might not feel into with all sincerity, ease and grace that exists apart from resistance.
  I wouldn't say I am 100% resistance free about absolutely everything and anything, but I'm pretty darn close as close as can be I'm imagining...know better than to go looking. And because I was on a roll of acceptance, expressing sexy, happy, socially friendly....had a liberating conversation with a neighbor who gave me a bag of shavings for our guinea pigs.
   Another enighbor from one street over showed up mowing the lawn next to mine...she shrugs and says "I just keep going!" lol. That is SOOOOO me! lol Put a mower in my hands and I just keep right on going. She was making her way around the entire neighborhood. Love it!
   Now the sun is setting and I am releasing whatever it is that exists between me and the abundance I'm getting...not attaching thoughts or memories to feelings has my mind completely empty and clueless as to why I'm crying and that is absolutely OK with me. We're not looking for and thus not creating a problem...we already know the solution is letting go and that is already happening but we're not looking for that either so we aren't creating 'something to let go of' when we already did all the clearing needed already, lol......no more thinking, seeking, analyzing, reflecting...just observing and realizing. Peacefully. Thanks for reading!

Swimming in a sea of angels

  We journeyed into remembering so we could return to forgetting with a greater awareness and appreciation of exactly what that means.

    Our body is not just "a temple", a place for us to worship and be worshiped, it is a billion and one angels (that is not an exact literal numerical representation nor even a ball park figure). These angels are in various degrees of limitation and remembering for a billion and one (again not exact literal or ball park) reasons: volunteered, requested, 'sucked in by accident', tricked, etc. They, too are worshiped and worship.

   So when I am still and quiet I can look at my own skin and know (and for those of us with extra-sensory perceptions/awareness) and, "smell" and hear those angels in a chorus, all 'worshiping' that which I call me. And in the air I breath, all those particles my eyes cannot see come dancing in upon each breath billions of angels, singing, reuniting, rejoicing with those they meet as they brush up against every one existing as a cell upon my lips, in my sinuses, in my lungs, in my blood and back out again to dance in the leaves of trees and join in the air to become water...our entire physical existence is a swimming in a sea of angels. The ringing of ears, the hearing of our names when no other person is present are those angels remembering for a moment, reminding us to remember that they are there, that they are aware in every moment of this dance we are dancing of physical experience.
  We are not just an angel we are a cooperative, we are not a mere cooperative, we are a cooperative of cooperatives with unlimited potential if we just let go of the idea that we are alone in a piece of meat we call a body in a world with no conscious recognition of what is happening. That tree you cut down is angels that agreed to be a tree, do they really agree to be a house? Did you ask them? Are you aware permission was given?
  Yes, it is all entered into with the light hardheartedness of a child at play and indeed that wants to be felt and at the same time it is entered into with the maturity and groundedness of committment and sacrifice and faithfulness with honor, respect, acknowledgement.
  And when we come across one another's perspectives, even at the "highest" levels of consciousness there IS going to be differences in the nuances of our teachings. One might get pissed and feel great chaffing at this idea of swimming in angels: rejoice in it! we have agreed to forget one another's perspective so we could experience this thing physical expression. Or we may dance in the recognition and rejoice in the common beliefs and then wander away and wonder "what did I ever see in that?"...we came close enough to share the experience, remind and remember and went on again with individual experience.
   The flesh is here so we can enjoy the 5 senses. It is not dependent upon food to eat, air to breath, etc...nothing can poison a person unless that is the level of forgetfulness we are in. The food is there to taste, for the angels in the juices of the berries can come say hello and experience communion with the cells that have agreed to be taste receptors, to commune with the angels that agreed to be cells of blood in the body. And as each cell/cooperative of angels touches there is invitation and agreements : hey! hello! we are doing this! ...oh yay! switch places with me? I'd like to be a part of that body today and such delightfully 'silly' things we can imagine.
  Even I could try to read this next week and think "dang, girl you hit big crazy with this writing" and then a year from then I might remember again. Either way, by running into one another's writings, moments of lucidity, dreams, etc we shall be reminded. Then we will forget at least partially so we can have the most authentic experiences.
 So yes, I swim in a seas of angels in an eternal womb of consciousness.

On the Cusp

     Trying to start at the beginning here..prone to jump around. Over "the past few days" I have noticed a certain detachment from the body. I was standing outside gazing at the night sky when I noticed my body was shivering mightily. I did not feel cold at my core and realized it was alot like when I was a child and went swimming...you know how it goes: lips are purple and teeth rattling insisting "but I'm not cold! Why do I have to get out?!" lol
    Today I watched a video interview of Natalie Sudman and recognized so many similarities in mannerisms, ways of expressing, experiencing, remembering. I knew exactly how that feels and of course it was delightful to be present in energies where there were no major differences....the flow is easy when it is flowing in the same way-multidimensionally.
   My son the past few days has been talking of a dream he had where I was killed and wants to sit on my lap and hold me forever "mommy I don't ever want you to go". I have felt often today a sense of something impending that will bring GREAT change to my experience. It reminded me very much of when I experienced my "quickening" and my daughter cried out "no mommy! don't leave!".
     I am dying. I am dying 'to myself' in that: in order for the human form to be maintained with the presence of a higher consciousness residing perpetually, there has to be a separation between the collaborative consciousnesses of the parts of the body (the mind cooperative, heart cooperative, intestinal cooperative, etc) so much so that the expanded consciousness interacting with the world loses awareness that the body has consciousness of it's own. The whole purpose of this exercise of "coming into expanded consciousness in human form" is so that we remember to include the awareness of the physical perspective, it's needs and desires.
    So, for me, that means to remember considerations, politeness, acknowledgement of the contribution we make to one another's experiences. There is divine consciousness experiencing extreme limitation, sacrificing it's direct connection to the heavens so that divinity can experience occupying physicality. That hair you hate? It knows you hate it, it reacts and responds to it with it's own personality and divine consciousness. It needs to be cared for and taken into consideration. The heart must forget it is a particle of the divine, limitless and formless so that it can hold it's form....we need to remember to be considerate of it: if someone is going to energetically blast it, we need to take notice and protect it. It has taken on a child-like awareness so it only remembers it's chosen form of being.
    These divine aspects, expressions, entities have agreed to do this with us immortally. That's ALOT of trust! That's ALOT of commitment!
    One does not walk up to another, begin a communication, announce themselves with a criticism: "Tell your children not to do that"..."Shouldn't you be wearing shoes?"...."Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can't help them, at least don't hurt them."
HELLO?!

1. These other divine expressions, in sacrifice to the experience, relinquish the ability to express as vividly as the consciousness occupying them. We must be that FOR them. Sorry about the print change..WTF? lol ahh O.K. back to normal.. Anyways. In all our "oneness" it serves us to be aware of this and it serves those following us. This detachment also separates us from the memories of "past experiences"; the pain, sorrow, sadness, everything emotional and feeling that went with it. So, we really have no clue exactly how powerful the impact of our presence is to those still going through it. We will not be connecting to them on the emotional level. Our experience of "the past" is an awareness of "energetically exclusive experiences", each and every moment, interaction, shared experience, is an energetically exclusive experience "bubble" that we perceive as having absolutely nothing to do with any other. So, for example, anything that happens during one interaction is perceived as completely irrelevant to another. You may have to remind me of "yesterday" as you experienced it with me because "today" is a clean slate and if you wish our interaction to be based on "yesterday", YOU must bring that with you with all due consideration to the fact I may choose NOT to. You will not be allowed to hold me to that. I choose my experience. I choose who I want to be, what I feel I am to be in any given moment. I am sovereign and I might be cooperative according your perspective or I may not be. And yes, I might need to be led through it as one would a child who is unfamiliar with the complications of organizing travel arrangements, schedules, appointments, etc.....do ya'll still schedule whole weeks ahead? months, years: it's bloody unfathomable from my position! Do not expect me to know the date.....I've been drawn to the energy of a moment, not the bloody planned arrangement and agenda you may have for it! lol Each and every moment is opportunity, experience, expansion and that each can be so unique is....AMAZING! AWESOME! AWE-INSPIRING! FANTASTIC! DELIGHTFUL!
2. We WILL still experience our own feelings. The difference is, they will be exclusive to that moment, strangers to any other moment and so not "as deep/heavy/thick/laden with memory of the last time we felt that feeling". Each feeling has a different nuance unique to each experience. For example sadness in one experience might be 'tainted' with excitement. It will carry it's own unique energetic signature or "smell" (as those of us with higher awareness are prone to call it) exclusive that one "bubble" of experience. In another "bubble"/experience that sadness might be 'tainted' with difficulty or hesitation or delight and so forth. The combinations of energetic experience are endless! INCREDIBLE!
3. I am who I was yesterday, I just not be the same as you remember me because what I can be is an endless combination of feelings, thoughts, emotions, attitude, and personality. Or I can be a completely blank slate. Let's Play!
4. Play with mercy because I notice I'm more prone to the poetic license and energetic flow than I am to sentence structure, etc. a word might feel better than the one more accurately descriptive at times, a rhyme might catch the interest and used for the sake of that alone and I noticed a preference for words of a softer vibration for the ends of sentences....I'll do my best to keep it structured though! I am quite capable......just not always interested.....