Know thyself, they say

This blog post is for informational, educational and spiritual development purposes only.  Warning: sexually explicit descriptions necessary for complete, honest conveyance of the physical, emotional, psychological and spiritual mechanics of sex ARE included. Clicking on the link to this post is agreement to expose yourself to it, declares you over 18 years of age or having parental consent.
        We allow the inner mechanics of thought and feeling to be blasted on radio waves when it comes to murderers, rapists and women abusers under the label "RAP music", paying millions for it...I think we can handle allowing the following!

      After a c-section, something really irked me. I was disturbed by the idea that a complete stranger, the doctor, had seen and handled parts of me I would never see or handle. We live in a society where we are taught to imagine people with degrees will always know us better than we could ever know ourselves. Being so self-aware, this idea offended me. Being independently orientated, I strove to know more about how to diagnose and treat my own body, but in the matter of surgery, it really wasn't anything I would be able to do for myself and so there was a bit of feeling powerless and thus resentful because I didn't believe I needed the surgery to begin with.
    This idea of dependency upon others for fulfilling the needs and desires of the body extend to our sensuality. Self soothing when it involves genitals and self pleasure are taboo beginning in childhood when we are discouraged from touching our genitals. Then there are religious rulings on the matter. Self-awareness and self pleasure in this department are relegated to pay for phone sex, porn and other "unfit for general public" venues. Even that I feel compelled to introduce a disclaimer on such posts says it all.
  My innocence and purity has been haunting me, however, as I have resisted the inclusion of the voicing of the full spectrum of intimacy with it while including emotional journies through the most intimate fears and feelings of the rest of the body-heart and mind. So, I honor the clean sensuality of my inner being by sharing it's experience of self awareness and mastery. Why should I be dependent upon another for pleasure?
     "I will tell you a secret. When you speak to me about 'do you want to kiss this? Do you want to kiss that?', my body gets very excited and I imagine exactly those things and more.  So I reach down and I touch my flower, smearing that sweet nectar around my vulva. I move my hips in pleasure. Soon I find my finger sliding into my vagina as I imagine your penis doing the same. Then my body wants more, so with my other hand I massage my clitoris while I plunge my finger in and out of my vagina and move my hips around and around until my entire body shudders with orgasm.  As my vagina begins to relax and I withdraw my finger, I smell the sweet smell of my own nectar. I fall asleep for a nap and dream the sweetest of dreams."
Welcome back experiences of female ejaculation, this time solely in response to me!