Something "evil"came, now what is up for May?

     So, something came in and destroyed that in me which was holding me back in spiritual understanding, freedom and abundance. Now I am feeling great joy and excitement, expectation associated with the month of May.....which probably means something of a test is coming. I will experience some sort of loss or deprivation, I expect. My soul gets excited and I begin to dread, lol. Getting to be quite the routine! Already, my ride to an upcoming appointment has been cancelled and the one giving me the ride was elusive about it, signifying a reluctance in the matter, so I have lost a "friend". Was never really a friend, but just a neighbor and energy vamp. Been dumping such baggage lately of my own accord lately, anyways. No more dragging around "dead weight" with me, the spiritually dead who would use and abuse under the guise of familial, romantic or friendly relations. But it is how I feel about this that is changing. No resentment or reluctance due to a feeling of neediness and self-doubt in how I am "reading" them.
 That is exciting.

Is "wormwood" coming? Wormwood is an herb used medicinally, misused it is poisonous, but in proper doses, it is medicinal and healing. Waters usually refer to spirituality or emotions and so some spiritual messages may be "poisoned", some may be bittersweet, tears might be cleansing, losses bittersweet.