Undermining Power

      I was always confused and thrown off, heartbroken and devastated, thinking something was wrong with me as a pattern kept repeating in my experience. I just wasn't getting something and it was leaving me feeling persecuted, evil, a poison to everyone and everything I would be included in. A part of me refused to believe it because I approached everything sincerely and innocently with love in my heart and understanding and acceptance of others my only intentions.
     Then this morning, I was given to see.
      The pattern was this: I would seek a spiritual teacher and family. I would get the hang of things. I would then get expanded understandings and share them delightedly. They were met with aggression and intentional undermining and demonizing of me. I would enter a secular field and experience the same thing. I developed a persecution complex with a chip on my shoulder while refusing to believe in anything but my innocence, a great rift, a great wounding.
     This morning I faced another undermining when I had followed another's example for guidance and allowed synchronicity to deliver the rest to fill in where they had not equipped me. After attending my hurt while basking in the blessed perfection I was given to perform in, the understanding was received by my head that had refused to see me as anything but how I saw me.....truth, perfection, goodness, love, kindness, perceptiveness, understanding, acceptance...these undermine the powers that exist from oppression and 'righteousness'(legislated rightness). They flow right in like water beneath a cliff and wash away it's sandy, fragile foundations exposing 'weaknesses', untruths, 'unrighteousness'. In retaliation, those thus undermined consciously undermine the one coming with goodness, expanding, bringing in more than them. It's tit for tat, eye for an eye, in their minds energetically equal vengeance and thus justice. The truth they seek is perceived as and made into an enemy. In their minds I am being punished fairly.
  That is hard to take, but in understanding comes acceptance....finally. Rift filled in, chip discarded, no longer a victim, no longer naive...still innocent.